When god created him, and his brothers and sisters, they were all created without gender. There was no need for angels to procreate. Besides, there was no place for sex or other animalistic activities in heaven.

It had taken him millennia but he didn’t regret volunteering for this. He had been preparing for the rapture and it was a lot of work. He didn’t know exactly how many people will be lifted up at the moment of rapture. All he knew is that it could be anywhere between 0 and near enough 7 billion.

He had decided to err on the side of caution and prepare for 7 billion people. Now that is a large welcoming hall and a complicated party to organise.

The biggest one he had done before was for a few thousand people. He had organised music throughout the hall, played by millions of angels. He had rehearsed with them and it took many hundreds of years before he could get them all to be co-ordinated. The timing is complicated to get right in a hall built for 7 billion people.

Halfway through the plans, he had changed the hall too. He felt it might be a little too restrictive, and so he changed it to a meadow. That took many years again. This also threw off all the acoustics and it took many more years to practice for the musicians to get it right again.

He had thought about food and he flip-flopped on whether to provide it. There is no need to eat in heaven, but people are so used to pleasure and comfort of eating, he thought. In the end, he organised food, or at least something like it.

He recruited a few thousand angels to prepare food and drink. One of the benefits of heaven is that things don’t go bad. This meant that they had as much as they needed to prepare all the food.

He watched as platters of food started to pile up on the millions of tables across the meadow. He watched as butterflies floated across the meadow, basking in the late afternoon glow.

Xioban had decided that the feeling of late afternoon would be the ideal time. It would be the time when you get that lull in the day.

While all this was being prepared, he was also negotiating with the four horsemen. They were not big fans of the apocalypse. They had enjoyed their laziness over the years and were not looking forward to doing some actual work.

If they were on earth, they would have gotten fat and useless. Luckily for them, they were immune to such things.

They had spent their time between heaven and hell, partying hard and taking it easy. Xioban had found it difficult to light the fire of enthusiasm within them. They did not share the passion as he did for the rapture. This would have made Xioban sad, but he didn’t have the gift of the rollercoaster ride of emotions. None of the angels were.

Pestilence had been the most vocal

“How many people will my babies have to” he made quotation marks in the air “take care of?”

“I have no idea” Xioban had to admit “but, it’s more than likely no more than maybe a third. I hear the earth has a lot of religious people.”

“Alright, fine!” Pestilence grumbled

Death was a bit more direct

“I better not have to make too many trips. I don’t like Pela getting tired” He looked at his horse as he said this

“Don’t worry about Pela. Your horse, and you can take as much time as you like” Xioban had said.

The other two horsemen had just grumbled. Over the centuries, Xioban would revisit this conversation in one guise or other. Each time, they would complain and they would finally agree.

Over the centuries, he had found that it took longer and longer to get to the point where they agree. While he had found this a trifle worrying, he figured it wouldn’t be an issue. Since there was no deadline, he could take all the time he needed to convince them.

One day, Xioban was basking in the glory of the almighty, in a meadow somewhere. His eyes closed, and his mind still, he heard someone clear their throat. He opens his eyes to find someone standing over him. His (he assumed from the way he was dressed) wings were white and only partly open. He was smiling, as everyone does.

“It’s ready!” He said

“Everything?” Xioban asked, almost surprised. It had been centuries that he had almost forgotten about it.

“Yes, everything.” He said

Xioban smiled, and thanked him.

Xioban got up and made his way to the four horsemen. It might have taken a few minutes, a few hours, or perhaps a few years. Nobody knew, and nobody cared.

He saw them dancing in the moonlight, around a fire. As he walked up to them, they stopped, and from the expression on their face, he suspected they already knew.

“It is time” Xioban said

“Yes, it is” Pestilence replied.

Xioban smiled, turned around and made his way to the gatekeeper. A few moments of walking later, he could hear soft hoofbeats behind him. He smiled.

It took some time to get to the gatekeeper and nobody spoke the entire time. Xioban enjoyed the walk. He liked the rhythmic beats of the hooves following him.

He saw the gatekeeper, sitting at an ornate desk. The desk was in the middle of a meadow, under a solitary tree. The tree was lush and green and seemed to have different types of fruits. They had different shapes, sizes and colours.

Behind the tree was a stream, and he could hear it babbling. It soothed his heart.

When Xioban got closer, he could see that she was smiling. She heard him and looks up.

“Oh! Hello, I have been waiting for you” She said

“Hello, and I, you. It is done!” He bows as he speaks

“Are you sure?” She asked. Xioban wondered if she too had almost forgotten.

“Alright!” she said, “I’ll push the button as soon as you get to the hall.”

Xioban bowed and started to make his way to the hall.

“Wait!” Pestilence called him from behind and he turned around

“We’ll come with you” He explained, “We want to see how many make it up”

Xioban nodded, turned around and continued to the hall.

It might have taken many years again, but once again, he enjoyed the walk.

When he got there, he closed his eyes and prayed. He then walked over to a podium, and pushed the big red button on it.

The musicians started to play music. The air, already filled with the luscious aroma of food, now also carried the sweetness of music.

Xioban waited, and nothing happened. He pushed the red button again. This time he heard a click and a whoosh.

Three people appeared in front of him. It looked like they had just jumped up, though he didn’t see them jump.

Xioban pushed the red button again, and nothing happened. He heard the click, but no whoosh. He tried pushed it several times more and there was nothing apart from the clicks.

It was dawning on him that his millenia of preparation was perhaps meant for only three people. He put on his biggest smile and looked over to the three people who looked lost and confused.

“Welcome to heaven!” He said into the microphone.

He heard his voice across the meadow. He turned the microphone away and walks down the stage and to the three people.

“It would seem that you are the only ones worthy of heaven” Xioban started to explain.

From the looks on their faces, he knew that this would take some time. He called over some of the angels waiting to induct the newcomers and handed the three people off to them.

Pestilence got off his horse and walked towards Xioban.

“We are not going down there to take care of 7 billion souls.”

“Wait! Let’s go back to the gatekeeper. Maybe there is a problem” Xioban hoped there was a problem preventing more people from coming up.

The walk back to the Gatekeeper took some time. He did not enjoy this walk.

He was almost running now, and he could still hear the soft hoofbeats, following him. It was as if they were chasing him now.

“What happened? What went wrong?” He asked as soon as he got there

“What do you mean?” The gatekeeper looked confused

“What do you mean? What do you mean? There were only three people” He was almost shouting now.

“Really? Well, what can I say! There are only three people deserving of heaven down there” The gatekeeper was nonchalant.

“But that’s impossible! There are 7 billion people down there” Xioban was pleading now

“Ah! You have not been watching them” The gatekeeper tried to explain.

“What do I do now?” Xioban seemed to muster up sadness from somewhere.

Xioban hears someone clear their throat behind him and he turns around. It’s pestilence and he too looked distraught.

“Erm, so what do we do?” Pestilence seemed to be pointing the question more to the gatekeeper.

Xioban looked at the gatekeeper, eyes almost full with tears, expectant.

The gatekeeper mulled it over for a moment.

“Listen guys, just go back to what you were doing. The people down there are doing a fine job of bringing the apocalypse down on themselves”

I briefly look up and spot the two parachutes landing close by. I look around and spot my target - he is amidst them all in a chariot, heading towards me. The two parachutes land in flanking positions amidst the army. I unsheathe my sword and can’t help but smile.

The soldiers come at me in swathes and I cut them down. I feel my sword enter the heart of one and the lungs of another. As I begin to feel myself get bored of the bloodshed, I clear a circle around me. I leap on to the shoulders of the ones closest to me and run across on the shoulders of the soldiers before they have a moment to realise what is happening or react. I run across and when the chariot is but a stones throw away, I leap and land on one side of the chariot. My lieutenants are not here yet but I see that they have seen what I did and they do the same thing. I turn around and roar.

The soldiers around my leap up on to me and drag me to the floor. I use my sword to block the attacks and push back hard as I leap to my feet. I fight them off and it doesn’t take long for my lieutenants to get to me. Once they distract the soldiers, I use some of the dead soldiers and the shoulders of some who are alive to help me leap on to the top of the chariot. My sword cuts through the top of and I use my hands to rip it apart and drop inside.

I see the fear on his face as my swords softly touches his neck and a smile creeps into my face. I use my other hand to reach for my hip flash and take a sip.

His hands tremble as he reaches under his seat and brings out the urn. I can hear the screaming and fighting outside. As my fingers grasp the urn, I hear the whistling was was faint earlier rapidly get louder and turn into a shrieking whine.

The next thing I know I’m flying through the air riding a shock wave of epic proportions. I crash into the ground and I look around and see that my lieutenants have also landed nearby. Immortality is cool but it can be painful at times. I pick myself up and look behind to see that most of the army is decimated. In the air however, I spot airships - and they’re not mine. They glide low and drop soldiers to the ground and they amass like ants and they rush towards us.

I signal to the other two and turn around to spot our airship in the distance gliding towards us. Its bay doors opening slowly. The hot air hits me like a wall as I leap up and grab on to the hanging door along with the other two. I lift myself up into the bay along with the others and hit the door close button. For an instant, I felt the g-force spike as the air ship made an abrupt stop mid air and lifted off directly into the stratosphere.

I pat them both on the shoulders, grab my flash and finish it off as I head to the cockpit…